Thursday, March 12, 2020

Name Calling


When I was growing up in grammar school where I went, and in the

neighborhood where I lived, kids called each

other by their last names, at least the boys did.

Even best friends did that. Not the girls, though. They were all

acquainted on a first name basis.

The boys—Hey, Sherwood, you get a new bike for Christmas?

Arnoldy, you want to throw the football around

after school?

Did you hear that O'Toole's grandfather died?

And the girls—Martha, I like what you’ve done with

your hair.

Peggy likes Bobby Kennedy. I saw them talking

on the playground at recess today.

Kathy, I’m inviting you to a party at my house next week.

Of course the boys were changing friends all the time.

One day you’d see Tilley all buddy, buddy with Fusz then

bad mouthing him to Barron the next day.

And then there would be fights on the way home from school

most every day. Waldman and Stube are gonna get into it.

Stube is gonna beat the shit outa Waldman. Betcha he is.

Hanch, you wanna come and watch?

Last names were always used by the boys to address

one another,

but they referred to the girls by their first—Christine is

sure fine, but that Robin, she’s a dog.

Funny place where I grew up and went to school. Kids never

stayed friends for very long. Leastwise, the boys didn’t anyway.

Makes a guy anxious to grow up and move away.

Today I call all my friends by their first name.

Robert doesn’t want to be called, Bob, though. And by me,

that’s perfectly okay.

                                    -30-

Chris Hanch 3-11-2020

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