Every Night I Pray

I am not a believer in the Hereafter, It was not

always this way. This is how science, religion

and old age have fashioned me.

The evils man has levied on mankind and nature

without a supernatural enforcer to intercede has

led me to understand that man needs to take re-

sponsibility for his own good and dastardly deeds.

I am, however, a believer that in our lives we are

all in need of a heaping dose of Salvation. Hell is

the payment wielded in life for our transgressions.

Anyway, I am convinced in my beliefs, as you are

certainly entitled to yours. Be that as it may, could

seem a bit strange to many that every night before

bedtime, I still pray. You see, it’s a hang-on tradition

for me, a left-over ritual from my childhood Catho-

lic upbringing.

I now see prayer as a daily self-accountability, and

a mindful exercise in remembering the troubled, the

needy and those who have passed away.

I begin my litany by praying to the memory of my

mom and dad, both of whom had substantial diffi-

culties in their lives, like depression, anxiety, drug

and alcohol abuse, anger and rage. You know, the

everyday trials and tribulations so many Americans

face today. And I (no surprise) got the hand me

downs which naturally include me in that insidious

genetic fray.

So, every night I pray, bless the memory of my mom

and my dad for the life and goodness they did manage

to pass along to me. I am responsible for dealing ade-

quately with all the bad shit which comes part and par-

cel with my inherant personality.

Son and daughter of mine (still alive), forgive me for

my shortcomings and idiosyncrasies. Please say a

prayer for me each night before I’m gone. You are

included in my thoughts and prayers as well.

Although I believe, as far as my mom and dad are con-

cerned, my prayers can no longer help or save them.

And, in remembering them nightly, hopefully it will

do a hell of a lot good for me, as I live and breathe, as

a flawed and fallible human being.

                          -30-

Chris Hanch 1-18-2020