Friday, July 17, 2020

Nut Grass!


Nut grass! I told the woman at the property man-

agement office over the phone. Do you know what

nut grass is, I asked her? “Well, er...a... no,” she

stammered her reply.


It’s a damn weed,” I went on in a rant. “Grows

fast and high, a crop of long blades bunched to-

gether, about 18-inches tall, grows like hell even

in the hot, dry, Midwestern summer...Nut grass!”

Your lawn service hasn’t mowed the lawn here in

nearly two weeks!” I pitched my bitch at her. “You

folks are letting this property go to hell!”


I’ll tell you, people these days, smart phones, smart

TVs, smart watches, smart everything, and they don’t

know nut grass from a hole in their ass. What in hell

is this world coming to?


When are they going to come and cut the grass,”

I asked?” “Oh, “I do believe I hear them outside now,”

she raised her voice an octave or two as if pleasantly

surprised before hanging up the phone. That was two

hours ago, and they still haven’t arrived.


Damn nut grass!


                                 -30-


Chris Hanch 7-16-2020

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