Buyer Beware

Carvana, a new way to buy cars, they claim on TV.

They invented the car vending machine. Wow, imagine

that, buying a 25-30,000 dollar car online, and in person

unseen—no tire-kicking, door-slamming, no tactile

touchy-feely, no new-car smell!

What the hell? It’s kind of like choosing a love interest

or prospective spouse using the internet. What you see

is likely to be a photo-shopped, bait-and-switch, game of

deceit. I prefer the old-fashioned, touchy-feely approach,

even should it result in a well-deserved slap in the face.

Besides, what if the auto vending machine should jam?

The friggin’ thing is way too large and cumbersome

to shake. What if you push the wrong button and get

one with peanuts instead? Don’t you just hate when that

shit happens?

Chris Hanch 2-19-19