The Squeaky Wheel

When you grow up with two brothers

you have to learn to take turns and to

share, at least that’s what our parents

taught us. Seems, though, my older

brother mostly got more, my younger

brother usually wound up with less,

and it was somewhere in the middle

for me. Whose turn is it anyway to see

our favorite program on TV? Of course,

I would argue for me. Who was keeping

track, who would be the arbiter to re-

solve the three way dispute? Mostly it

was our dad, for he had the muscle and

undisputed power of decree. Besides, when

left up to mom, she would hear each boy’s

case then tend make her determination

based on that stupid “squeaky wheel gets

the grease” idiom. Hell, I didn’t even figure

out what an idiom was until I became old

enough to go out on my own. Then, I came

to realize, turns aren’t always fair, and por-

tions are rarely split evenly. Had I grown up

with sisters instead of brothers, I was told by

a friend, things could have been a whole lot

worse. When left to their own devices, all girls

need to do is to cry, and then it was game over.

With brothers, he reminded me, at least you had

the option to “duke it out.” As for me, I can

relate better to slang than I can to those stupid

idioms anyway. It’s a guy thing, I suppose.

Chris Hanch 4-20-19